The best I've been able to do to spite my mother is not buy a paper shredder. Really. She's on my all the time to do it, and I think she lies awake nights thinking about all the people waiting to rummage through my trash and steal my identity.

Of course, someone WILL at some point, because the Universe is there for nothing if not to prove that my mother is always right.

I have tried this approach. I have been told it is childish.

Ever tried explaining that when she treats you like a child, you tend to respond in kind? I know how frustrating it can be and she may very well never stop bugging you or treating you like a child.

I've been told by some parents to choose my battles. Is it more important to have pleasant visits surrounded by boxes of books? Or is it more fun to argue over unpacked boxes? Your mom may be choosing the wrong battle.

Mom loves Home Depot, she ends up trying to find projects to do after she buys her cool new toys.

Tep is Min from "Bet Me", pass it on.

Heh. Kind of. Though my Mom really isn't that bad at all; I'm just stubborn over past Issues.

Ever tried explaining that when she treats you like a child, you tend to respond in kind?

No, I might try that.

I've been told by some parents to choose my battles. Is it more important to have pleasant visits surrounded by boxes of books? Or is it more fun to argue over unpacked boxes? Your mom may be choosing the wrong battle.

Can you explain this to her please?

Buffistas are very wise. Thanks for all the advice. I am feeling less over the edge now.

I haven't been to Home Depot in forever. I like Lowe's better.

I don't have much in the way of control issues with my mother. I think that was one of the things that she had to deal with with her mother and swore she wouldn't do to her children.

My MiL, on the other hand, uses the phrase "You must" way too often. I can usually make a non-committal noise and let the conversation turn to something else, but just hearing it raises my blood pressure.

My mother is good about balancing parental advice and staying hands-off. She has a good speech about kicking kids out of the proverbial nest. And my father made sure we all read The Ransom of Red Chief at a young age so we knew where we stood with him. Hee!

ETA: Plei, that is one lovely little Lilyflower you and Paul made.

She has a good speech about kicking kids out of the proverbial nest.

I had to fight to move out on my own. Mom would have had me live there until I get married.

I'm the youngest, and when I went to college, my mother stood in the driveway and sang, "Happy Days are Here Again."

My parents have a certain sense of humor that can take some getting used to.

I've lived about an hour and a half away from my parents pretty much since college. Lately I've been sending applications across the continent. They're all, "Ooooh, new places for us to visit. Go you!"