I am decidedly nonfunctional until some period of time has passed.

I have: poured koolaid in my coffee, put catfood in the coffeefilter, dumped coffee grounds in the catdishes, poured cream in my oj, a spoon of sugar on the countertop, tried to brush my teeth with dish soap, poured hot water on the lit stove, put the oj in the closet..... and that's just the stuff that happens in the kitchen.

I love to wake early, but prefer if the other people do not. I like the solitude of the early morning.

This is me, exactly. my husband is a night owl, so I am more likely to get my solitude in the morning, and I have become more of a morning person since living with him. My parents are more morningish, and I was much more of a night owl when I lived with them.

When I lived entirely by myself I had pretty irregular sleep patterns, but I was also either in grad school or working 3 jobs, which probably contributed to the wacky sleeping (or not sleeping).

I'm not a morning person because if it were entirely up to me I'd stay up till 2:00 a.m. and not get up till 10:00. I've never been able to live that way for any length of time between school, jobs, baby, etc., but it's the pattern I consistently fall into on the rare occasions life allows it. And for the first few hours I'm awake, regardless of how well-rested I am, I lack energy and have trouble focusing for any length of time. I don't even try to work on a novel before lunch, and mostly reserve the morning for stuff like making phone calls and emails, household chores, and the like. And, to be honest, catching up on all my boards and mailing lists.

By around noon, I start feeling sharper, but my peak hours for energy and focus are from 3:00-11:00.

My ideal sleep schedule is the same as Plei's and Jilli's and juliana's. If I could sleep from about 2 or 3am until 11am every day, I'd be SO happy. It takes me a long time to drag my ass out of bed on the mornings when I have to wake up early (say, 6:30--my normal workday wakeup time), so I usually set the alarm early so I'll have a little time to laze in bed before rousing myself. I'll often not feel fully awake and perky until dinnertime.

(I also don't drink caffeine on a regular basis. Coffee would probably help me to be awake in the morning, but it would also make me feel slightly sick all day. If I'm really desperate, I'll have some black tea, but even that makes me shaky.)

sarameg, is it okay if I laugh? I need to laugh...

I recently realised I like being sleepy. Enough that sometimes I'm sad when I fall asleep.

But not getting enough sleep Friday night and having nothing to do on Saturday except lie around (and not sleep) is marvellous. I have no idea when that can happen again.

Well, Charles and Camilla moved their wedding to avoid the Pope's funeral.

Because they moved their wedding to Saturday -- the Grand National is being delayed by 25 minutes.

So you hate waking up, but are fully functional reasonably quickly? But resentful, I'd imagine...

There are a whole bunch of morning things that I do completely on autopilot, including applying eyeliner. I am cranky, non-verbal, and focused only on the next step of the autopilot morning routine. Do NOT ask me to make decisions, or do something outside of my routine, as I will (a) stare blankly, (b) growl, or (c) not even realize you've asked me a question.

sarameg, is it okay if I laugh? I need to laugh...

Go right ahead. When I'm not in the middle of it, I find it quite amusing.

I wake up all right, and can get it in gear to go to work without caffeine. In fact, I can probably get by without caffeine throughout the morning. But, since I can't get to sleep until after midnight at the earliest, getting up before 7:30 isn't my idea of fun, and I might stare at the bedroom door for a few minutes before I finally get up and into the bathroom.

I really wish I could take an after-lunch nap.

Yes, this. In fact, I can time my mid-day collapse to precisely 60 minutes after I finish eating lunch (I usually skip breakfast). Even Diet Coke drunk either with my lunch or immediately after doesn't help the afternoon stupor.

When I'm alone in the office I usually do.

Um, I've developed a strange ability to nod off with my head straight up, seemingly staring at the computer screen. I can lose minutes at a time this way. It usually only lasts for about an hour or so, and then I'm chipper again. Siestas would be a good thing for me.

A quick 10-minute walk is great for the mid-afternoon slump. Carry a folder and everyone will think you're doing something work-related.