I thought this was an interesting article (NY Times, registration required), and definitely going to hit some buttons, but it's really stirring people up.

I think the Waldman essay is, as the second link notes, sort of sour grapes. Oh, so the author-wife of a prize winning author has sex and is still madly in love with her husband? How those diamond shoes must pinch.

I'm not shocked. She's taking a lot of abuse for anything and everything she says over at Salon, too, and it doesn't seem proportionate to what she's actually musing about.

I thought it was an interesting essay.

But some of the abuse is so stupid.

So she wrote a confessional piece? And bloggery types, kings of confessional writing, find it odd.

Okay.

Or perhaps they are upset because their confessional writing never makes it to the NYT.

I thought it was interesting too. I know not of spouse love, nor offspring love, so I can't compare her feelings to mine.

I do wonder about her kids reading it eventually, though.

I'm trying to think of portrayals in fiction where the mother espouses more dedication to her spouse than her kids -- I can only recall instances in which there's sexual abuse, and she's letting it happen. Picking kids over spouse happens much more often, but then again -- you're supposed to protect them.

ita, do you have any more moving boxes?

I don't know if it's sour grapes as much as violating the current cultural presumptions about A Mother's Love. Which is presumed to be (as she notes) all-encompassing and supreme. It's almost shocking to hear somebody say they love their husband more than their children. Not because they do, but because people don't admit that so much.

I'm trying to think of portrayals in fiction where the mother espouses more dedication to her spouse than her kids

I can only think of one. A Danielle Steele novel that begins on the Titantic. Mom sends all the kids to the life boat and dies with dad.

do you have any more moving boxes?

Not that are empty, or likely to be soon, no. Sorry.

violating the current cultural presumptions about A Mother's Love

Very much this. I feel really unable to predict how I'd feel in her place, but just questioning my responses to that article is making me realise how much internalising I've done.

Mom sends all the kids to the life boat and dies with dad.

Was there room for her? Were the kids messed up as a result?

When I was in college we had a particularly ugly piece of campus sculpture called Solar Wind.

We also had an art department that would cover the campus in senior projects every spring.

A friend of mine (actually, remember that comic with the penguins the other day? that guy) foolishly left his damp laundry in the laundry room. Dude, we were being helpful when we hung it on the volleball nets in the quad to dry... it could have mildewed.

The fact that the next day was Easter and everyone on campus and their parents would be wandering around all dudded up on their way too and from brunch at the commons 25 feet away... and that it might be kinda awakward to pick your way through the crowd and climb around on a volleyball net pulling down your clothes... mere coincidence.

The fact that we lableled it Solar Wind II -- Senior Art Project (please do not disturb) PROTECTED his drying laundry from harm, darn it. How were we to know that people would go over and read it and take photos and point and laugh and...

I'm smiling just thinking about it.