Old trusty soda machine. I push you for root beer, you give me Coke.

Willow ,'End of Days'


Buffista Movies 4: Straight to Video  

A place to talk about movies--old and new, good and bad, high art and high cheese. It's the place to place your kittens on the award winners, gossip about upcoming fims and discuss DVD releases and extras. Spoiler policy: White font all plot-related discussion until a movie's been in wide release two weeks, and keep the major HSQ in white font until two weeks after the video/DVD release.


Kathy A - Sep 22, 2005 8:28:32 am PDT #7489 of 10002
We're very stretchy. - Connie Neil

4. They keep trying to make the same movies twelve times and act like we don't notice. Wow, Tom Hanks is heartwarming and befuddled again...didn't see that coming.
5. Embarrassing television remakes.
6. The prices are still really high but the films aren't worth the commitment.

These three are all of a piece, and the execs just don't get it. We want good writing, interesting characters, and to be entertained, damnit! Even plain old popcorn films that just bring on the pretty/action/funny have to provide something different, otherwise it's just a big yawner. What made the Hitchhiker's Guide adaptation more entertaining than Fantastic Four was the good acting by the guy who played Arthur and the fun quirkiness of the Guide itself. FF had none of that, and was boring as a result.

7. People act like the theater is their living room.

This is a pain in the ass, and some of my friends and family are just as guilty as others, especially the ones that like to chat during the film (drives me nuts!)


Jesse - Sep 22, 2005 8:32:54 am PDT #7490 of 10002
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

Has anyone seen that Witherspoon Heaven movie?

No, but I have to confess that your whitefont makes me way more likely to rent it eventually. I'm still annoyed at City of Angels, because I was looking for a jackass Hollywood happy ending, and instead I got Meg Ryan hit by a goddamned truck! Sometimes I like the bullshit happy ending.


Frankenbuddha - Sep 22, 2005 8:33:40 am PDT #7491 of 10002
"We are the Goon Squad and we're coming to town...Beep! Beep!" - David Bowie, "Fashion"

I'd also add that, no matter how many surveys they have stating the opposite, everybody (generalization ahoy!) hates the goddamn commercials (as opposed to trailers) before the movie. As in "I can get that shit at home if I want it".


Frankenbuddha - Sep 22, 2005 8:35:44 am PDT #7492 of 10002
"We are the Goon Squad and we're coming to town...Beep! Beep!" - David Bowie, "Fashion"

I'm still annoyed at City of Angels

Heh, your whitefont is the ONLY thing that could have made me watch that movie. I'd have laughed and laughed and thought all my Xmases had come.

signed,

Huge WINGS OF DESIRE fan


§ ita § - Sep 22, 2005 8:36:50 am PDT #7493 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

2005 box office to date (from boxofficemojo.com):

RankMovie TitleStudioTotal Gross / TheatersOpening / TheatersOpenClose 1Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the SithFox$380,115,6523,663$108,435,8413,6615/19- 2War of the WorldsPar.$233,144,3893,910$64,878,7253,9086/29- 3Batman BeginsWB$204,694,1473,858$48,745,4403,8586/15- 4Wedding CrashersNL$204,006,0003,131$33,900,7202,9257/15- 5Charlie and the Chocolate FactoryWB$203,644,5293,790$56,178,4503,7707/15- 6MadagascarDW$192,381,4294,142$47,224,5944,1315/27- 7Mr. and Mrs. SmithFox$185,380,9683,451$50,342,8783,4246/10- 8HitchSony$179,495,5553,575$43,142,2143,5752/117/21 9The Longest YardPar.$158,032,6613,654$47,606,4803,6345/27- 10Fantastic FourFox$153,524,7223,619$56,061,5043,6027/8- 11RobotsFox$128,200,0123,776$36,045,3013,7763/119/5 12The PacifierBV$113,086,8683,181$30,552,6943,1313/47/14 13The 40-Year-Old VirginUni.$91,686,9733,006$21,422,8152,8458/19- 14Monster-in-LawNL$82,931,3013,424$23,105,1333,4245/139/5 15Are We There Yet?Sony$82,531,1602,810$18,575,2142,7091/216/16

FF might have been more boring than HHGTTG, but it's done better (also relative to the posted production budgets).

We might want good writing and interesting characters. But many of us wanted Firefly and Wonderfalls too. Doesn't make them viable.


Jesse - Sep 22, 2005 8:37:19 am PDT #7494 of 10002
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

It was just not what I was expecting.


§ ita § - Sep 22, 2005 8:37:59 am PDT #7495 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

See, I'd have watched the Heaven movie to see how the conundrum resolves. Learning that there's no conundrum? FUCK NO.


Jesse - Sep 22, 2005 8:39:46 am PDT #7496 of 10002
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

I don't care about the conundrum, really. Assuming I'm in a mental place where that movie is appealing to me, I just want cute Mark Ruffalo to be happy!!


DebetEsse - Sep 22, 2005 8:40:27 am PDT #7497 of 10002
Woe to the fucking wicked.

Jesse, but CoA's was a pointless not-happy ending, rather than a natural conclusion to the events of the movie.


Jesse - Sep 22, 2005 8:41:34 am PDT #7498 of 10002
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

Yes! Phew.