Presto

Psst! You, on the other side of the Valley of Death! Over here!

Wanna see a trick?

Seriously, it's wicked cool. I need someone from the audience - yes, you, with the brown eyes.

waves handkerchief

What? Just what you always did: apologise, justify, keep your wedding ring on no matter what, tell me she's your wife, reconcile, leave her again, come back readdicted, lay your head in my lap and weep while I sweat the pain out of you.

Now, here's the neat part. Ready?

vanishes in puff of regret

I can become invisible. Amazing trick, huh?

Abracadabra, darling.

Great drabbles. I have sort of an editorial type question... Yesterday I got this Breath...submission on my desk. It is a very sweet story, at least it's supposed to be, and she's got some skills, but it missed my heartstrings by miles and I'm not sure why. But maybe I've had my heartstrings amputated. I like to think I can read in many genres,though. Should I vote to reject? I want to give the writers a fair shot and I don't want her to pay because I'm "callous and strange", but it's not easy because there's not much wrong with it, just something indefinable that failed, so far, to be right with it. Or I could be a heartless bastard...how do I tell?

Maybe you should just say that -- technically, it's fine, but she didn't sell the piece to me emotionally.

Reading others work is alway subjective -- I rejected a lot of stuff that was well done on the surface, but didn't make me feel for the characters.

That's true.. well, I took this on so I'd know how They make these kinds of decisions...I guess I'm learning now!

Sometimes it really is that simple, you know? Someone may be a technically decent writer, but if they're not hitting where they've suposedly aimed, it doesn't matter. I've read three or four pages of very polished writing that made me large with the Not Caring about the story or the characters. A big part of writing is a hugely subjective that way, in my mind.

I realized that, on my first read, my big sexy brain filled in some of the holes...the next time through, I focused on the words on the page, not the images I could expand from what's there. On that basis, it failed, so I had to reject it. Because I'm not writing that story. She is, and I have no way of knowing what's in her heart if she didn't type it out and send it to me. But it was a tough call. I like my version, too, but I'm not looking to collaborate anyway.

Maybe you should just say that -- technically, it's fine, but she didn't sell the piece to me emotionally.

Amy nailed it, as always. I'd stress that it's *your* reaction you're talking about, and that it's subjective, but the fact remains: the No Sale key got pinged on the emotional cash register.

I have a friend who have to most perfect grammar, and comes from a long standing family of writtings, but when ever I read anything fictional or allegorical, I can't help but wince because it feels horrifyingly clinical to me. I'll never have the nerve to tell him what I really think, so I do my best to dance around it. Mostly I say things like, "I liked your poignant view on the subject." And then babble about something I liked that he had and carefully avoid any questions by briskly changing the topping. Thankfully, he's still young and nubile so porn always does the trick.

Drabble: trick and/or treat

Generation gap

My great grandfather was a horse trader in Arkansas whose biggest triumph was that time he sold a blind horse to a Yankee and then, after the Yankee discovered his error, got him to pay my great grandfather to take the horse back again.

My grandmother didn't understand my dismay when she told me the story. I told her I couldn't be proud that her father-in-law had been a cheat, even a clever one. She patiently explained that 1) caveat emptor was the first rule of horse trading, and 2) the victim was a Yankee, which made it a real treat.