Ugh. Still frustrated. I think I've figured out some of the reason my perception of Sebastian is different from my CPs'--long story, and basically involves my subconscious use of him as a symbol for various issues in my background. But I'm so damn frustrated I want to cry, because I'm starting to wonder if my beautiful book that I love so much just completely sucks and is not even remotely salvageable, because it's all so clear in my head, but I just CAN'T explain it or come up with a fix that makes it clear to anyone else!

Argh!

t cries

Apropos of absolutely nothing to do with writing, Billy Idol's playing in Golden Gate Park next weekend, about eight minutes from my house.

You should go see him, deb. For research. You know.

Equally apropos, The Dalai Lama will be visiting Rutgers on Sept 25. I'm debating going. Pro: Probably my only chance ever to see him, even at a distance. Con: It will be in a stadium with 20,000 other people, and I expect any spiritual feeling will be lost in the crowd.

But I'm so damn frustrated I want to cry

This is why you need to let the book rest for at least a week without looking at it or reading it. You've got no distance at this point.

Read for fun, do some of the other things you wanted to do, and try not to even think about it. When you come back to it after a few days, I think you'll be surprised that it does not, in fact, suck.

Amy's right, Susan. Step away from the manuscript.

Well, the only thing I've been doing related to the manuscript is turning in my regular ten pages to both my weekly critique groups. It's just that the online group happens to be at one of the key turning points of the story, and so when they came up with big picture problems about characterization and motivation instead of just pointing out awkward wording or reminding me that I occasionally need to provide some action and emotion to reinforce my dialogue, it freaked me out.

The Monday group tomorrow should be fine--they're on a bridging scene, one that's necessary to the story in that otherwise the transition between what goes before and what comes after would be hella abrupt, and one that has some useful information and foreshadowing woven in, but it just doesn't have the same level of story significance or emotional investment from me.

But I promise that's all I'll look at until next weekend.

Billy Idol's playing in Golden Gate Park next weekend, about eight minutes from my house.

Well, invite him to your house, then knock him on the head, and I can be there in two hours.

we hates her, my preciousss, we hates her ... sss ....

Well, invite him to your house, then knock him on the head, and I can be there in two hours.

I thought I might wander over and see if I know any of the gate guys, truth to tell. If I do - if any are the old crew from BGP and FM Productions - I can slither backstage.

But even money on the crew being a bunch of newbies. Feh. Ah well.

Susan, is a CP a Critique Partner?

Also, is it possible they're just at a section of the book where they don't yet have the big picture--that your characters are more complex than their assumptions?

I have another column up at Romancing the Blog today. It's reader-centric this time, though.