I Like Pina Coladas

The black streaks ran down her cheeks and into the corners of her mouth; the look was past raccoon and into harlequin makeup. Looks like she forgot to wear the waterproof mascara today.

My boots splashed among the puddles left by the rain. Slick oil rainbows in them reflected street lights become twinkling stars on their surface. The clean smell of rain-washed air filled lungs that had labored in the oppressive pre-storm humidity; being outside felt good.

Too bad for the breathless girl on the ground. Her puddles ran red with the blood from the hole in her left temple.

Sail, one suggestion? I think you might want to hyphenate "pre-storm". I read it twice as "PRES-torm" and wondered what it meant....

I debated on that. I think you may be right, spellchecker didn't recognize it as a word, either.

Not sure why it triggered visual dissonance - maybe because we have two consonants surrounded by vowels? "es-to" is the way my eye breaks that, for balance.

So, I saw pres-torm.

I've done that before with other words, deb. Totally understandable as far as I'm concerned. I went back and edited the drabble to put the hyphen in.

Lesser-Known Editing and Proofing Marks

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BWAH! I like "remove from your lexicon".

"You wish" made me giggle.

"Please revisit your politics," is my favorite, followed closely by "Add expletive for emphasis." Go ahead. Act surprised. Has anyone seen my muse? She seems to have pissed off.

"Delete--no one cares" is one I could use from time to time.