ION, having a baby in the room while I work at the laptop gives me plenty of opportunity to teach her the meaning of "no," because she really wants to play with the keyboard.

Hee!

Oh my good god, yes. I'm a snuggly person some of the time, and I love a good hug, yadda yadda kissycakes, but I reach my tactile limit pretty quickly. If I had a kid hanging off me all. day. long. I would go stark screaming mad.

I could cuddle, kiss, sing, read, and take walks all day. What I can't do is play games with them all day. I do play with them. I don't play all day long with them. Plus? I think they need to play without me nitpicking them.

And co-sleeping? The bed isn't big enough for me and Stephen, if you ask me.

Have they? Isn't it societally allowed for the father to be "less" of a parent than the mother? And if both parents are "less" at the same time, who picks up the slack?

That's kinda what I mean though. I'm going to be a little "less" (and I think the quotes are exactly perfect for what I think we're trying to put our fingers on) so Mr. H would have to be a little "more" parent and a little "less" worker. But nobody expects or thinks about that way, just that I would have to be a little "more" of both.

looks at baby in bouncy seat on floor next to her

tickles baby's tummy

goes back to B.org and eBay

Good Enough Prenting scared me, at first. Sometimes, I feel horrible for being irritated that Em chose the last 5 minutes of the movie/show I'm watching to freak out and I can't hear how it ended. Sometimes, I wonder if I'm not helping her develop because she;s in the bouncy seat and we aren't reading (I already read 4 books to her every morning after first feeding and one at night.) or singing or playing. But sometimes, if I don't check an email or price something that I don't need, I get resentful and a resentful mommy is not a good mommy, usually.

t being able to participate in a parenting discussion AS A PARENT is still kinda, "Whoa. WTF??"

Isn't it societally allowed for the father to be "less" of a parent than the mother?

I think this is true, sadly. I have friends who, if we're going to a movie, let's say, will tell me their husband is "babysitting" the kids. And when Stephen took our three, seven-month-old baby included, up to his parents' for a weekend, I had friends who were horrified. As in, "You trust him?!" Which I think is weird, because he's their father. And even though he works outside of the house all day, at home, he cooks, he gives them baths, he reads books to them, etc. It came really naturally to him, which is another reason I love him so damn much.

Cindy made me choke on a grape.

Hee. Sorry, Chi. I can totally see how that came across now, and I'm giggling, only because I have no grapes on which to choke.

Gud, if that came across as smartass, well (a) I hope it made you chuckle, and (b) all I really meant was, maybe you just need to read it, and see if you believe it, or if it's at least worth further investigation.

I have a hard time with some of this. I find myself closer to the conservative scholars in personal beliefs, but not so close to conservative Christianity, as it plays out socially speaking, in a pluralistic society. My newest line to my (actually much beloved) Christian friends about the marriage issue, is that Christians have so many issues with our own marriages, that I don't think that a newer family arrangement which may potentially involve somewhere between 1% and 10% of the population is *the* threat we need to worry about. We have seen the enemy and he is us. On the other hand, I think the liberal scholars cherry pick, use completely arbitrary means of determining origins of the NT, and like to make Jesus into a fluffy puppy to justify their own agenda, and he wasn't.

My problem with this? I happen to believe he's who Christendom has claimed him to be, for the past two thousand years. So I gotta keep talking to the Christians.

their husband is "babysitting" the kids

Oh, can I even begin to tell you how much I absolutely loathe this?? You don't babysit your own damn kids.

You don't babysit your own damn kids.

Maybe he's getting paid?

No, I got nothing. Men walking toddlers or dandling babies -- adorable and increases their attractiveness (or so goes the popular attitude). Who ever heard of a woman borrowing a kid (even on a sitcom) to appear more attractive to guys?

Aimee, you're ahead of me. I've been averaging one book a day with Annabel lately. Though I read to her more when she was younger and not able to roam around the room and entertain herself.

In related news, I was just whistling "Over the Hills and Far Away" (probably inspired by my search for a Sharpe theme for the laptop desktop) last time Annabel wandered by and tried to take over the keyboard. I sing all the time, but whistle less frequently. She loved it. Grinned, bounced up and down, gave me the "Do that AGAIN, Mama" look.

We have a friend in Michigan that was positively scandalized when I said that MM wanted to be a stay at home dad and that I supported that. She couldn't believe it. Hell, he's so good with Em that I trust him to stay home almost more than I trust myself.