Sophia, I'm going to go mostly "weird Hollywood thing," along with some natural baby-fat loss for some.

OK, so there was just a dog (food? I dunno. I got distracted by the HORROR) commercial on. One of the clips was of that typically gross dog activity of licking the other dog's stuff. Which, you know, not really selling me on the cute&wunnerful world of dogs. Why didn't they just show the litterbox snacking? Or the crotch sniffing?

Not cute.

Dude, the worst ad ever is the one for clorox wipes or whatever, where the dog is LICKING THE HOTDOGS on a plate. EWEWEWEWEW.

You know, I love dogs, but they are hella gross. My friends Pek a pug used to like to sneak into the bathroom with people, and then lick the crotch of their panties as they were peeing. Very disconcerting...

Wow. Cop just called and asked for money for one of their charitable things, and when I said no, he hung up on me. Rude cop.

Dana: Not a cop. Telemarketing liar trolling for idiots.

Not that cops can't be rude.

hardtack is what I thought, basically flour and water crackers.

Hardtack that I've encountered is not at all like communion wafer - because it's a hard lump of bread, not a wafer.

Dana: Not a cop. Telemarketing liar trolling for idiots.

Gus speaks for me.

I hate those, Dana. The calls in general. The potential for abuse is just there. Well, from random telemarketers too, but somehow it being authority figure you should be able to trust, but you maybe just said No to them and what if you got the one asshole and....

I'm ok with dogs, but ...well as soon as I let the dogs out of their crates at the last babysitting gig, one jammed her nose at my crotch and wouldn't leave me alone and the other went straight to the litterbox and started snacking. My cats lick their asses and occasionally land on my head causing massive bleeds, but at least they don't eat crap.

Sophia, I remember reading an interview with Claire Danes about a year after the cancellation of MSCL in which the interviewer admired her rail-thinness and asked her how she did it. She rolled her eyes forever, then sighed and said that of course she was starving herself, that everyone she knew starved themselves and ate the bare minimum because they were all teenagers and wanted to do nothing but eat like horses, but their managers and agents howled at them if they did, so instead they'd all sit around for hours after auditions talking about all the different foods they'd be eating if it weren't for their fucking careers.

It was a sad interview. She sounded extremely bitter about what she was missing out on, and aware that this was all unhealthy, but also completely resigned to the fact that if she gave in and ate like a human being she'd be unemployable.

ION,

Dude, you are turning into Andy Rooney before my eyes.

reminds me of one of the funniest things Spy ever did, a short quiz entitled "Rooney or Seinfeld?" with about a dozen unattributed "Didja ever wonder..." Bemused Every Whiny Man quotes from either AR or Jerry Seinfeld, and it was completely impossible to tell whose was whose.

Dana: Not a cop. Telemarketing liar trolling for idiots.

Hmm. But he didn't want a credit card number or anything. There was talk of sending an invoice.

Not that it matters, since we don't give money over the phone. But man, regardless of who it was, hanging up on a prospect just makes it way less likely that they'll get something out of me if they ever call again.