Thanks.

Erika, this is fantastic.

Fantastic! Bless! Just - I have no words. Bless! Very very well done you.

Bless!

Thanks...I hoped you would like it!! I realized last night that I forgot to put in one of the scenes that are major House highlights for me...maybe later today. Vicodin mixes nicely with Monkey Crack, apparently.(don't tell the doctor...he's out of control enough.)

Dr. House was genuinely surprised to get the summons from Cuddy this time, instead of faking incredulity like usual. It was true. A lot of things were better when nobody faked it.

“Dr. Cuddenstein,” he greeted her. “I think you’re trying to seduce me.”

”I know I told you my name got cut off at Ellis Island, but it’s not “Cuddenstein” so you can stop calling me that any minute now, okay? And I would, but what would we do for the other five minutes?”

“What? What’d I do this time? Didn’t even get to use the crash cart, which I admit lacked dramatic tension but I thought would at least spare me the sight of that vein in your forehead.”

”I got a call from Karen Tyler today.”

“Who?” He knew damned well, but acting above it all gave him some mystique.

”Jaye Tyler’s mother. She is upset that you let Jaye leave the hospital AMA.”

“It wasn’t A *my* A. Or Foreman’s either. We didn’t find anything. So, what did she really call you for? To borrow your copy of “Powerful Women,Powerful Breasts”?”

Cuddy swallowed a smile. She could only rarely afford to let Greg know she thought he was funny. “No, she called Shapiro, in Psych.”

”That little apple-polisher...he won’t be happy until he finds something wrong with her. Justifies his salary...the little putz.”

”What would you do, Greg. If your daughter started getting messages from stuffed animals?”

“If she were my daughter, I’d start stepping up the urine tests, Cuddy, in all honesty. But we didn’t find anything there either...I’m serious as a muscle infarction.”

She nodded. “If you’re wrong, the guilt could be tremendous...how much do you trust Foreman?”

“He’s good. It’s annoying because he won’t take direction, but I trust him in all matters related to brains. It’s Chase who is the dirty little rat.”

“Do you always talk about him like that?”

”Yeah...it’s good for him. Cancels out all the gasping over his cute little Australian accent.” When she glared at him, House said, “But I cancelled the t-shirt that said “I ratted out my mentor and all I got was this lousy t-shirt”. I thought it could be damaging.”

“Yes.” Cuddy said, dryly. “They should have just asked your psychological opinion.”

“Ask Wilson...he’s not a monster like me, right? Does that make me “Cuddenstein’s Monster? “

“Yeah...talked to James. Imagine my surprise when he took your part, yet again. When you drink a glass of water, can he talk at all?No...that’s not fair to Wilson...but you haven’t been strong-arming him or anything have you? Because I said your name and he got all flustered and blushed like...well, never mind. Now, James Wilson may not be the $84 million man like some people in this room, but he’s a damn fine oncologist and I’ll stand up for him because it’s my job. It’s my job to stand up for all my people, House. Do you understand? Even a guy like Shapiro. He’s okay, even if he’s not a hot-shot.”

“Yes, yes.” House said. “I’ll just tell Ms. Tyler when her life’s ruined by medications she doesn’t need, the stigma of mental illness, and possibly a nifty bonus like shuffling when she walks that it should be okay because our Chief of Staff is a team player. I’m sure that will impress everyone at the group home.”

“That’s not fair,” Cuddy said.

“The truth isn’t, you know.”

“Yes, yes.” House said. “I’ll just tell Ms. Tyler when her life’s ruined by medications she doesn’t need, the stigma of mental illness, and possibly a nifty bonus like shuffling when she walks that it should be okay because our Chief of Staff is a team player. I’m sure that will impress everyone at the group home.”

“That’s not fair,” Cuddy said.

“The truth isn’t, you know.”

I find the potential of this part heartbreaking, and it's all very well written. Nice way to end this bit.

Thanks...I was afraid I didn't capture the whole turns-on-a-dime thing.

I think you captured it very well.

Agreed. You've got House voice and character down pat.

I just have to let some of my natural tendencies run rampant. Scary, huh?

When you drink a glass of water, can he talk at all?

This may actually be a bit too clever for Cuddy. But it's an awesome line, so I don't mind. And the fact that she immediately apologized was spot-on. 'Cuz she's really not a snarky bitch. House just brings it out in her.