t hugs his Tivo close

On the other hand, I would like one of these:

Do you need a Perfect Machine? Well, "need" is a strong word. Do you need your TiVo, iPod, cable TV, DSL, subscription to the New Yorker, or dinner at Chez Panisse? If you say yes to several of these things, you're likely the type to need a Perfect Machine.

The Perfect Machine ameliorates laziness, refines sloth, embellishes indulgence. Here's an example: Like TiVo, the Perfect Machine would record all your TV shows. But it would make your shows accessible anywhere in your house, on every laptop and desktop, on every other Perfect Machine, every connected thing. I live in a small apartment in Oakland, Calif., designed in such a way that I can't see the one television in the apartment from the kitchen, which is where I spend a great deal of my time. Cooking, for me, is a pleasure, but a pleasure best combined with reruns of "South Park." So here's the difficulty: I'm in the kitchen. I'd like to watch what's on my TiVo. How can I do this? I need a Perfect Machine.

Or say that you're on your couch, 6 feet away from your computer, which is playing one of the tens of thousands of songs you have stored on its hard drive. You have a sudden, insatiable desire to listen to another song, a specific track, let's say, the Stones' "Satisfaction." If you're the type who's OK with getting up and walking to the computer to change the track, you don't need the Perfect Machine. If, on the other hand, you're like most civilized Americans and would prefer to change the song using a remote, with a listing of all your songs displayed on your television, you need a Perfect Machine.

Seriously. I love that description.

In your recent first world problems update, I lost one of my two satellite feeds, so my Tivo will only record one show at a time.

I CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS, MAN!

It's prolly just a cable. The dog escaped under the fence right where one of the connectors is and it was tenuous to begin with. But now I gotta buy a longer cable and run it through the wall again.

I've always had it record my suggestions, and it is sometime capricious about it, but we've rated enough it's usually pretty good. I suspect there must be something in the calculations that factors in what you've recently watched, 'cause when the SO watched a King of the Hill marathon, it just kept recording him more and more King of the Hill. We wanted Nielsen then, 'cause, funny.

I would totally buy a Perfect Machine. Please survive, Tivo!

Oh, yeah, and I bought the SO a cooling pad with fans as Part Deux of his b-day present. We've been having problems, so I gave it to him early, and I think it's already making a big difference. Hope it helps.

He made a comment, too, that made me think he's going to be very happy when the Levenger's shows up.

/me wants an Apple Tivo. An Apple HDTivo.

An Apple HDTivo with wireless access.

I would order a drink called an "Appletivo".

And digital audio out, natch. Comes with the Airport Express capabilities.

I might have to get Airport Express when i move, now that I think of it...

That Apple Tivo is sounding better and better.

OMG. They could include a remote with an iPod-style scroll wheel, so that scrolling through large music lists on the TV is as convenient as it is on the iPod. My Xbox controller does a pretty good job, but nothing beats the scroll-wheel.