I remember one conversation I had with my grandma in the mid-'90s when she used the word "colored," which really took me aback and I almost corrected her, or at least questioned her use of the term, but my dad was sitting there and he instilled in me a rule of "never correct your grandparents about anything, because then you're disrespecting them."

but my dad was sitting there and he instilled in me a rule of "never correct your grandparents about anything, because then you're disrespecting them."

there's definitely something to that, but if they are offending someone, I don't think that there's anything wrong with letting them know, politely.

I went to the University of Virginia, so I dealt with a lot good ol' boys and girls. I went out to dinner with one friend and his family, and his grandmother was there. She was very nice, but at one point turned to me and said "are there many negroes at the university of virginia". Of course my friend and his family were horrified, but I could see that she really was trying to be nice, and in her generation, that was respectful. I just said "well ma'am, there are probably about X number of african-americans here now" She said "african-americans? hm!" as in "this is a new concept, I must ruminate". My friend and his family fell all over themselves apologizing, but I wasn't offended, because I honestly thought that she was trying, and you can't be offended when someone is doing their best.

but I wasn't offended, because I honestly thought that she was trying, and you can't be offended when someone is doing their best.

I really believe that counts for a lot in the world -- both the trying and the respecting that someone is trying.

And then there's the issue of the word being used in music. The music crosses shores, but the history of the word doesn't, which can result in awkward situations when a non-USian person hears the word in a "friendly" context in a song, and assumes a benign or even positive meaning.

I went to a friends wedding in Canberra Australia a number of years ago, and for whatever reason I hit it off with her little brother, and we became penpals. There was a time he was LOVING Eminem Rapper (sp?). I, not a big fan, was horrified, and told him thusly. "But I just love the lyrics". So I actually listened to them, and explained what he was saying "you realize he is saying this about his mom? Your mom is a sweet lady..." About 3 months later, he announced, "by the way, you'll be happy to know, I don't really listen to MnM anymore". So ya, slang will jump ship, but not the definitions.

And just to keep it sort of on topic, when I first read the Harry Potter books, when I pictured Mrs Weasley, I totally saw his mother.

Eminem's hot.

Okay, not in any practical way, but his anger can be infectious, and he has a decent sense of irony about his work, even though not his life, it seems.

I find Eminem very compelling. And sometimes he makes me want to throw up. On him.

Someone was talking about HP crossover fic upthread, right? Well, I found The End of the Beginning, which I'll admit I haven't read yet, but reading the description sounds...intriguing:

London, 1981. Rupert Giles and Ethan Rayne may not be wizards, but they thought they understood magic -- until the night they saw a glowing green skull in the sky above a quiet London street. Now they're caught up in a civil war in a world they never imagined existed. But can their "Muggle" magic really win the war? And for which side?

I love the author's very old (written between Gof and OotP) fic, "Harry Potter and the Polka Dot Plague," which is a pretty light fic that really nails Snape's character and dialogue.

Tangent warning. It's pretty much agreed that either Giles or Rayne would kick the a*s of The Boy Who Lived, right? Mainly 'cause of the fact Potter has to use a wand, whereas Giles/Rayne gets by with his hands.

Potter: Stay back. Or I'll...point this 12-inch long stick at you.

And then Giles/Rayne kills him with a flaming thingamabob.

Rayne/Giles and HP? Nifty.

But it starts the year that Harry is born - right?