reassure her family that she wasn't headed off to meet with mass murderers, who are the same people who raised a significant amount of money for someone they'd never "met"?

To be honest, there are extremely few people who know that the trip was a present from the strangers-on-the-internet-and-especially-from-that-man-whose-name-is-on-tv. My parents still don't know, for example - I still, to this day, have no idea how to tell them that in a way that will make them understand. So only a handful of very close friends know this (and, well, the whole internet, but let's not get into that).

I think what made the difference for my mom was the way I managed to personify the "strangers on the internet". For example, the invitation to JZ and Hec's wedding, in which there was a most generous promise that if I had come, they would have managed to supply a kosher meal at the wedding and so forth. Proving to my mom that even though those people were stangers to me, in a way, there were ways in which I was not a stranger to them, that they knew things about me and cared. To my dad, the only thing that made a difference was that I came back in one piece.

The idea that there are ways to make friends, and some are right and some are wrong -- and that the way is more important than the friend. It's still a person, right?

He became hung up on this, and then I unhung him. Ten years from now this conversation won't be necessary, because "this" will be really and truly in the mainstream.

I apologize for being defensive, but I felt like I was being called out for what many others have had to go through, with the added spice of the DF is pitiful and controlling for zest.

Edit: Nilly, I apologize for mis-characterising the situation.

So only a handful of very close friends know this (and, well, the whole internet, but let's not get into that).

Isn't that such a weird concept? I mean...the things my mother doesn't know about me. I fear the day she becomes Internet-savvy.

When did this shift happen by the way?

The most recent was at the writers panel at AFI, he introduced me to the 40-year-old virgin guy, who stopped by on his way out to tell Tim that he was a huge fan of Firefly.

So there's context there for saying, "this is Allyson and she worked on that Variety ad."

The time I remember before that was on set at The Inside. We were both introduced to someone as "the women who put together that ad in Variety."

I do know that the ad was a big honkin' deal, bigger than we were aware of for a long time, with network folk impressed by it, and I wish I had known that way back then. It meant a lot to so many people and I tend to discount that for some reason I do not know.

It really was classy and spoke well of fandom.

I apologize for being defensive, but I felt like I was being called out for what many others have had to go through, with the added spice of the DF is pitiful and controlling for zest.

Oh, that's probably my fault, I apologize. I'm searching for understanding and running roughshod over people instead of being conversational about it, and I'm sorry.

To be honest, there are extremely few people who know that the trip was a present from the strangers-on-the-internet-and-especially-from-that-man-whose-name-is-on-tv.

Eh, Nilly, my parents will find out about my sooper-seekrit double life if I'm ever so fortunate as to get the thing published.

There seems too much to explain, and the one time I tried to explain my mother told the family that I was President of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fanclub.

So I just stopped explaining. I think that's probably a very sad thing, they must think I'm terribly lonely.

Maria, no! No need to apologize, I just wanted to make things clear, because, well, frankly, I hate so much the fact that I couldn't find a way to tell this to my parents, that it's bugging me. Your description was completely accurate (regarding the having to calm my parents, even though I made sure they knew I was going to meet people I already considered friends).

Isn't that such a weird concept?

The thing is, I wish I could tell them. It's such a wonderful thing, and I want to be able to share this with them. But they would never understand - they couldn't be able to accept the size of the sum of money involved.

if I'm ever so fortunate as to get the thing published.

Don't answer me if this is a too-nosy question (and I apologize in advance, of course), but do they know how well you write?

I think that's probably a very sad thing, they must think I'm terribly lonely.

Having friends all over the world, and making them happy, sure is a lonely thing.

Oh, the "Xenogenesis" I meant is by Harlan Ellison, not Octavia Butler. It is a popular title, isn't it? It's a semi-infamous essay about crazy fans. Allyson, you might find it interesting just because it is coming from the POV of the writers/targets. I'm sure I can dig up a copy to send you. Along with the thing I was gonna send you MONTHS ago that is sitting in my desk drawer right now because I suck so very much. Sigh.

"Well, you're on the internet, so it can't be all bad." Though she does regard it as a poor way to find a husband.

Heh.

Yeah.

Along with the thing I was gonna send you MONTHS ago that is sitting in my desk drawer right now because I suck so very much. Sigh.

Heeeee. That's a pattern with you, isn't it? ;-}

Is The Inside an arc show (like Wiseguy)? A stand-alone show (L&O, CSI)? Or a combo of the two (BtVS, AtS, Wonderfalls)?