I feel the same way about getting autographs from my writer friends. It feels like turning a deep relationship into a surface one.
Inara: Who's winning? Simon: I can't tell. They don't seem to be playing by any civilized rules that I know.
'Bushwhacked'
The Minearverse 3: The Network Is a Harsh Mistress
[NAFDA] "There will be an occasional happy, so that it might be crushed under the boot of the writer." From Zorro to Angel (including Wonderfalls and The Inside), this is where Buffistas come to anoint themselves in the bloodbath.
Betsy HP - May 23, 2005 9:03:09 am PDT #7227 of 10001
If I only had a brain...
Maria - May 23, 2005 9:04:36 am PDT #7228 of 10001
Not so nice is that I'm about to ruin a Friday morning for a bunch of people because of a series of unfortunate events and an upset foreign government. - shrift
Can I ask how, or is that too personal? What was it that made him get past his initial worry about where you were meeting new friends, and what caused the initial worry?
Not at all. For reference, this was earlier in our relationship, before I delurked on b.org. I never made the distinction about how I knew these friends. Not meant to be malicious, but I didn't think it was important, and he did. We talked about it, worked through the issues, and he's good. It didn't help that there was other stuff going on around us that contributed to some communication problems. Now, if I meet Vortex or meara for dinner, there's no quibble. He knows they're my "Buffy friends" and the only thing he says is, "Have fun!"
He had no idea that there were people online who weren't looking to cheat on their significant others, scam the elderly out of their hard-earned retirement, or hack into sensitive government databases. Like I said upthread, he was really and truly clueless as to how the internet is today. There were some unresolved trust issues that he had to deal with, stemming from his last relationship, and he projected that onto me. Once that was dealt with and he understood I wasn't undergoing a 180 personality swing and trying to kick him to the curb, we moved on.
My initial post was for illustrative purposes. There is a large group of people out there who don't get the phenomena of online communities and friendship. Didn't Nilly have to reassure her family that she wasn't headed off to meet with mass murderers, who are the same people who raised a significant amount of money for someone they'd never "met"? I don't think my situation was all that different. It's like trying to explain BtVS or AtS to someone who's never watched--you really can't without it sounding a bit silly and simplistic. For that person to understand what either show is about, they'd have to watch.
Steph L. - May 23, 2005 9:06:28 am PDT #7229 of 10001
I look more rad than Lutheranism
Didn't Nilly have to reassure her family that she wasn't headed off to meet with mass murderers
My mom certainly thought I was going to meet my imminent doom. She got over it when I returned unscathed, with my virtue intact.
Polter-Cow - May 23, 2005 9:07:03 am PDT #7230 of 10001
What else besides ramen can you scoop? YOU CAN SCOOP THIS WORLD FROM DARKNESS!
What virtue?
Steph L. - May 23, 2005 9:07:27 am PDT #7231 of 10001
I look more rad than Lutheranism
Now, hush!
Cashmere - May 23, 2005 9:07:40 am PDT #7232 of 10001
Now tagless for your comfort.
The first time I went to meet Buffy fans face to face, I flew to London. My family thought I was out of my mind. It all turned out well, though.
Polter-Cow - May 23, 2005 9:07:48 am PDT #7233 of 10001
What else besides ramen can you scoop? YOU CAN SCOOP THIS WORLD FROM DARKNESS!
Now, hush!
Your secret's safe with me.
ChiKat - May 23, 2005 9:08:04 am PDT #7234 of 10001
That man was going to shank me. Over an omelette. Two eggs and a slice of government cheese. Is that what my life is worth?
Meeting someone in the supermarket is still meeting someone, and that's why it's somehow acceptable
And I don't understand how people can say that meeting someone online is any more dangerous than meeting someone in person. You can see if they really are a 30-ish male vs. whatever someone says they are online, but other than that? Odds are just as good that they're an ax murderer. Or trades in white slavery.
§ ita § - May 23, 2005 9:08:21 am PDT #7235 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
I'm surprised at how little my friends and family twitched at the idea of me moving west not yet knowing which intermet person I was going to stay with.
Frankenbuddha - May 23, 2005 9:09:49 am PDT #7236 of 10001
"We are the Goon Squad and we're coming to town...Beep! Beep!" - David Bowie, "Fashion"
[NOTE: if you 'fuffle over this, I KEEL YOU!!!]
'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle 'fuffle
craxy! craxy!