Giles, if you would like to get by in American society, then you are going to have to follow our traditions. You're the patriarch. You have to host the festivities, or it's all meaningless.
[NAFDA] Workshop, post, discuss, and read Smallville fanfic here. Most, but not all, will be slashy. After all, PPO does stand for Pansexual Prettyboy Orgy.